Let's install McAfee

I file this one under "woes of an IT Professional serving the public"...

it's more PEBKAC than anything else.

So, as some of you may know, I work on the phones, doing remote support for an ISP in the eastern united states. Yesterday, I got a call from a customer who was having some issues getting, and staying, connected.

It was a strange issue, since the customer had no issues getting to most webpages, but couldn't load either of the two he needed to connect his computer to me, even in safe mode (with networking).... I decided, after about 45 minutes, to ask him to uninstall his Antivirus (McAfee). I also inquired about having something installed prior, and he mentioned he had McAfee before, but 'removed' it for the new version. Well, uninstalling worked, long story short, his 'removal' of his previous version wasn't complete, it failed or crashed or didn't complete for some reason, and he still had some of the firewalls from the old version.

I EXPLAINED THIS TO HIM.

We have a tool... the filename is MCPR.exe and it's the McAfee removal tool (there's a similar one for AVG and another for Norton). This tool removes any and all McAfee software from your computer. I was going to use it to uninstall the broken version, but first, wanted to download the installer to get the current version re-added to the system when I'm done. I asked the customer to log into the website where we download it, and he did, and when clicking on the download link, it came up with "error 31", which is something we see sometimes. "We" have a support department that can specifically handle error 31 with a significant amount of ease, and presuming the customer can get in touch with them in a timely fashion, we can have the error resolve in a matter of minutes.

So I send him off, and finish up some of the other work I had to do on his system, and take another call, and I'm working on other peoples computers... by the time I get back to his screen, HES INSTALLING MCAFEE AGAIN.

Yes, let's reinstall a problematic software, so we can run the removal for another piece of software that will just so happen to completely wipe out exactly what you're doing.

and he was all happy about it too, he typed into our support chat "only 7 minutes left!"
I was like.... no, we can't do this, I havn't run the removal. I asked you to resolve the error 31, not reinstall the application.

I immediately cancelled the install, shut it down and started the removal tool.
After that, reboot, got him to re-login to the download page, and re-downloaded and re-re-installed the application.

The system now works as intended... however, there seems to be an issue somewhere on Layer 8.

You didn't get the virus from your ISP

it amazes me how much misinformation is still going around. Peoples conceptions about how or why they get virii infecting their systems. Since one of the primary focuses of my job is remove malware from client computers, I've become exceedingly good at it. The stuff that amazes me is when people wonder why they have to pay for a service to remove the virus that's now stopping them from getting online.

There are a few major schools of thought on this, I'll go over three, starting with a common one, but not one I'd like to focus on today.

"You're supposed to be providing a service. I can't access that service. This should be free!" ... Since our positioning is as PART of the ISP's infrastructure... (factually not the case)... they believe that if for any reason, they cannot get online, it falls into our (the ISP's) job to fix whatever the issue may be. No exceptions. Unfortunately, we only guarantee internet coming out of the back of OUR modem. If YOUR equipment can't receive the signal and utilize it, well, that falls into our department as much as your broken TV falls into the task of your Cable Co.'s jurisdiction to fix it. AKA, not.

This next one is super common...

"But I have XYZ Security software from you to prevent this type of thing!" ... Okay. Just because you got a virus while using a service we re-sell on behalf of another company, does not entitle you to use a paid service for free because something got past it. If you would've read the service agreement, I'm sure you would have seen a 'best effort' clause... stating that the protection is not 100%, that they can only defend against KNOWN virii. Hense, if the virus is NEW, or not yet known, you can still get it.

I love that one.

... not.

This last one is less common but just as irritating:

"I get internet through you and therefore I got the virus from you, so it's your obligation to fix it" ... okay. You didn't get your virus from us, you got it from the INTERNET. There are a lot of people and places on the internet, and scanning all traffic for virii is an ASTRONOMICAL TASK!! We're not going to do that, nevermind the fact that even if we did, it wouldn't be perfect (see previous point). YOU were the one dumb enough to click the link and run the software, on YOUR equipment... the internet works fine, you're just a dumbass. Just because we provide you with a connection between you and the web doesn't make it our responsibility what you do with that.

Enjoy your virus.

Anyways, I had to rant there briefly, I hope noone minds. Play safe, and keep away from those damn dirty virii.